Husband I, Sarah Adams take you, Lawson Kuti
as my lawful wedded husband, to love
and to cherish, in sickness and in
health, till death do us part" she smiled
at him through her veil. "You may now kiss your bride Mr.
Lawson" The Pastor beckoned. Lawson's heart raced as he gently
unveiled his bride's face. She looked
so beautiful. He gently bent over and
placed a soft kiss on her lips.
Sarah in
turn embraced him tightly with tears of
joy streaming down her face. "Never leave me Sarah" He whispered
in her ear. "I will never leave you" she whispered
and they slowly released themselves
from the embrace. "I present to you the latest couple!"
The Pastor exclaimed excitedly The church cheered and Sarah cried
more in her husband's arms 5 years Later Sarah silently tip toed behind her
husband. He was in his study,
engrossed in reading. She smiled to
herself and gently covered his eyes
with both hands. "It's just you and I in this house Sara,
plus, I smelled you the moment you
walked in" He dropped Sara released her hold, sighed and sat
on the study table, "Why do you figure
me out so easily? I can't even surprise
you! That sucks" she curled her arms
around his neck "You are my wife, nothing you do is
supposed to surprise me" He playfully
pecked her nose. "But you've been in the study all day
and I'm bored!" She rolled her eyes "So what kind of fun do you suggest
we have then?" He swooped her off
the table in his arms "No! no that kind of fun!" She hit him
playfully till he put her down "Ok", He folded his arms on his chest,
looking into her eyes, "So what do
you want us to do?" "Not us. Actually, all I want is to play
with your play station and you've
hidden it again! Just give it to me and
you can continue your reading,
pleaaaseee" She blinked her eyes
playfully "No way", He went back toward his
study chair and sat, "Not my play
station" "Why! You never let me touch it…like
its your baby" She sulked "Well", he rolled his eyes, "Not like
you've given me a baby yet" Sara paused for a moment. Did he just
say that to her? The words struck her
deep down "You shouldn't have said that
Lawson…" She managed to say, her
countenance changing. "But it's true…I'm only saying the truth
Sara" He turned to face her, still sitting
on the chair. "The truth? You think I don't want us
to have kids?" "Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying
that…" He stood to face her now. "Then what are you saying Lawson?
Tell me, what is the truth?" "Let's not do this today…please. You
can have the play station and play all
you want. It's in my footwear locker
and the key is in my Bible" "You always do this…hurting me with
your words" Her voice began to shake "Don't start Sara please" "Tell
me why you said those words to
me! I want to know!" "Because I'm tired! I want to be a
father! I want to have my own kids
Sara…" " and you think I don't?!" Sara flared,
trying not to let the tears pour "Then why can't you get pregnant
Sara? This is the fifth year we are
trying." He clenched his teeth and
walked out of the study room. Sara was in shock. She sat on the chair
for some seconds, stood up again and
sat on the chair again…this time she
held on to her blouse and burst into
tears. 2weeks after "Lawson, wake up please" Sara
tapped him Lawson gently opened his eyes and
looked at the alarm clock by his
bedside, "It's 2:00am Sara…" "It's urgent" "I'm listening" He said
drowsily "Mother says we should come for
tests. She says she's spoken to her
doctor and he said we should come." "What?" Lawson opened his eyes
now, "Your mother is in the UK for
Christ's sakes" "Let's just do it. We can go for the
weekend, lets just give it a shot,
please." "No. That would be rather expensive
and…" "It's my birthday today and the only
thing I want from you is this trip" Lawson fell quiet now. For the past
two years now, his wife's birthday
skips his mind…totally. "I'm…I'm sorry Sara…It skipped my
mind…" "It always does" She lay down back
on the bed, backing him. Lawson wrapped his arms around her
waist, "I said I'm sorry…" No response. Lawson sighed, "Fine, we go this
weekend" "Really?" She turned sharply, excited "If it will make you
happy today" "Thank you baby" She hugged him. A week after Sara jerked
at the vibration of the
phone in her pocket. "Hi mom!" she pressed the phone to
her ear with her shoulders, wiping the
washed dishes with her hands. "Honey…" "What is it mom?" she pressed it
harder "The result…the result of the tests…"
her mother cried Sarah gently dropped the plate and
the wiper, hear racing…"Just say it
mom…" That night "I can never have children Lawson…"
Sara cried Lawson felt his world crash right in
front of him, "W…what?" "Mama called today…she's gotten the
tests results" "Jesus Christ" Lawson stood, placing
his palm on his head, "b…but you told
me you were ok before we got
married, you told me the doctor said
your abortion didn't damage your
womb" "Don't bring my past into this!" Sara
flared Lawson laughed and got serious
almost immediately, "You are crazy. I
married a crazy woman!" Sara looked at him in shock, like he'd
lost his mind. "The results say you can never have
children and we both know that this
has to do with the abortion you had
before we met!", he flared, "are you
happy?…you know we're screwed
right? No kids? what re we going to tell the world?" "Lawson we can
adopt…" Sara cried "Adopt? Wow!", he laughed again, "I
married a funny woman too!" He got
serious again, "Its still not our baby!
The damn baby is not my flesh and
blood! You are full of deceit Sara" He
looked into her eyes. Sara could see him fighting his tears. "Lawson
stop…you are hurting me…"
Sara fell on her knees crying "You want to know what I'm
thinking?" Lawson looked at her with
disgust, "I'm thinking how on earth
I'm going to stand seeing your
deceitful face for the rest of my life" "Sara cried harder, "Dont give up
Lawson…So far I have a womb…I can
still carry our baby…" "I am not giving up on having my
baby, I'm giving up on you" Lawson
turned around to leave "Lawson!" She held his feet, "I'm
hurting too…" He only dragged his feet from her hold
and drove out of the house. She wept. A month Later "Mother, he's not
even talking to me.
All of a sudden we are both
strangers…He doesn't eat my food,
comes home late…he hates me so
much and it's killing me. I'm
confused…to think that it's truly hurting…" "For how long will you
hide this truth
from him. You've got to let him know…
you can't carry his…" There was the sound of a car horn "Mom I've got
to go…he's back" "Baby, you've got to let him know. It
can work when you two are one in
mind" "Bye mom" she ended the call. Lawson came into the house, about to
walk past her. "Lawson" She held him "I'm tired" He didn't want to look at
her face "I know…can we talk for some
minutes?" She tried to help him
remove his suit "Look what is it" He jerked from her "Do you hate me
this much? you can't
even look me in the eye? you can't
even stand my sight? Lawson…it's me
Sara…your best friend…" Her eyes
grew moist "I'm in no mood for this" He turned
around to walk away "Don't you dare leave when I'm
talking to you!" She dragged him by
the suit. Just then, some papers fell to
the floor. Sara quickly bent to pick
them up…her hands shook and her
body became numb all over. "D…divorce papers? Lawson?" She
searched his eyes "Answer me goddammit!" She held
him by the collar of his shirt, crying "They are for you to sign. I want to be
out" Lawson dropped "Y…you what?" she slowly freed him
from her hold "It's not going to work Sara, can't you
see?" "Lawson I can't believe you would
think of a divorce and even go this
far…why are you so wicked!" she
cried, angry "No! Why are you so wicked!" He
retorted, flaring "Think about me for once. I am a man
for Christ's sakes. My children are my
pride! and you are about to deny me
that for the rest of my life because of
your stupid mistake!" "What about me! have you stopped
for once to think about what I'm
going through" "It's your cross, carry it" Lawson fixed
his angry eyes on his wife "No, its now our cross and I am not
signing those divorce papers! We
vowed never to leave each other!" "Isn't it better Sara that you save
yourself more hurt and sign these
papers than to see another woman
move into this house before your very
eyes?" he said with a tone of sarcasm Sara's heart thumped, "What?"
"You heard me…another woman who
can help raise a family, so save
yourself the stress and sign the damn
papers. I need it tomorrow"He turned
around to leave again "She still can't carry your baby" Sara
dropped "Not all women had abortions. Not
every woman was like you." He
scorned "You are the one who can't give me a
child!" Sara let out, crying. Lawson stopped now, turned around
and walked towards her, "Whatever
your plan is won't work" "I told you I could never have a child
because its you who can't make me
pregnant" "Shut up! shut up Sara! what the hell
are you saying!" He shook her
shoulders violently "You are infertile Lawson…the doctor
says you have primary infertility…"
Sara burst into tears Lawson gasped, loosing his balance. "Mother
called me to give me the
news. I was shattered, I felt like my
world was over but more importantly I
thought of you. I thought of what the
news could do to you, I thought of the
best way to tell you… never for once did i think of leaving you. I bore your
insults, your scorn, because of my
past. It was so easy to judge me and
think of yourself. I am the one who is
hurting, I am the one who should
bring some miserable divorce papers… but I thought of you…I thought of
hope, faith and a miracle…I thought of
my vow to you on that altar. In
sickness and in health remember?",
she smiled through her tears, "all of a
sudden you are as weak as a baby… looking in your eyes, I can see you
sudenly have lost all your guards, You
are so wicked" "Sara…" Lawson fell on his knees, torn. "No!" She
quickly fell on her knees
too, "No Lawson…" She couldn't bear
to see him cry "I'm…I'm infertile", he cried, "What is
left of me?" he searched his wife's eyes "Lawson please…" she held his face, "I
understand…it has been so hard for
me…I have put myself in your shoes
since the first day…" "You don't deserve this…you deserve
better…I can't believe I scorned you all
along…please let me leave you" "No" she shook her head, "You are my
husband. I won't leave you. I won't let
you leave me…I believe in miracles" "I'm doomed…Sara I'm doomed…"He
allowed his wife take him in her arms
and on her shoulder he wept like a
child. In the Morning Sara gently opened her eyes, looking
beside her bed…it was empty. She
quickly sat up on seeing a note gently
placed on the bed. Hands shaking, she
opened the letter to read. Sara, I cannot bear the shame. I have
treated you so unfairly, yet you love
me still, you are with me even in this
condition of mine. To think that you
knew all along and you never for once
gave me a clue that it is my fault we are in this mess, makes me so unworthy of
you. I love you enough to let you
build another life with a man who can
make you happier. I'm torn Sara and
all I ask is your forgiveness. I have
always loved you and if you truly love me then please start your life over
again…without me…I am truly sorry
for disappointing you. Lawson. Sara couldn't control the tears. She
couldn't think straight anymore. She
picked her cell phone, shaking… "Hi Mr. Lawson's office please" "Hi
Lola…" she cried, "have you seen
my husband today?" "No…no ma'am, we've been expecting
him at work. He has a presentation is
fifteen minutes" "Oh God…God…" Sara dipped her
hand in her full hair "Everything ok ma'am?" "Thank you" she ended the
call. She quickly got down from the bed
and in her pyjamas she ran into her
car. She dialed his number repeatedly
as she drove…no answer. At 2:00pm She sped into Fred's compound, a
close friend to her husband. "Fred!" she banged the door hastily till
the door flung open "My God Sara what's wrong?" Fred
held her "It's…it's Lawson…have you seen him?
is he here?" "No…Haven't heard from him in a
week" "Oh God" she held her hair "What's wrong?" But she was already
walking away
into her car. "Sara!" He called after her. She zoomed away. 4:30pm
"Mom, Dad, I can't find Lawson…I can't
find your son…" she cried as she
paced in front of the two who looked
lost "You have to calm down and tell us
what happened" Lawson's mother put
her arms around Sara. Sara burst into tears, "Please Dad could
you try his number, maybe he'd pick
your call?" "Have you been to his office?" He
picked his cellphone and dialed his
son's number "I have been everywhere I know him
to be likely available" "It's ok…calm down please" Lawson's
mother pet her "He's not picking. What exactly went
wrong between you two?" Lawson's
father searched Sara'a eyes 9:00pm Sara was still in her pyjamas and on
her way back home, exhausted and
stuck in the traffic. She had told
Lawson's parents everything. The
poor couple was so shattered and also
begging her to begin a new life. Sara buried her head on the steering,
crying; she hadn't realized the green
light. "Hey get off the freaking road!" a
driver cursed from behind her "God please don't let him harm
himself…keep him safe and lead me to
him…please God…" she quickly started
the car and began to move. Suddenly she remembered the church
where they wedded and took their
vows. It was two hours from here; she
made a u-turn and headed for the
church hoping to find some peace. She tiredly got down from the car,
drenched and exhausted. She trudged
into the open entrance of the church.
She paused for a moment; shocked…it
was Lawson sitting at the front row of
the empty church, facing the altar. "Lawson!" She began to run towards
him, happy, relieved that he was ok. "Sara?" He quickly stood as she
approached him, "Sara…" They both ran into each other's arms.
He hugged her so tightly "I looked for you everywhere….this
was the last place I thought you'd ever
be…I just came and I saw you…
Lawson….I'm so happy you are ok"
she touched his face "I didn't know where else to go…It
just feels like I cant face the world
anymore…" he slowly released her
from his embrace. "Take my hand" Sara stretched out her
hand, "C'mon, just take it" Lawson gently clasped his hand into
hers and she took him to the altar and
stood to face him. She searched his
eyes so deeply and hadn't seen him so
weak and helpless. "Five years ago Lawson, we both
stood on this altar. Remember our
vows? Remember you whispered in
my ear never to leave you. I told you I
wouldn't…that's why I'm here. I am
your wife Lawson, I am meant to be with you forever, though the bad and
good times. We've had good times,
why would I leave you now? All I
want from you is to believe that you
can still give me a child despite what
the result said…I want you to believe in a miracle", she held his face,
"remember when you told me I was a
miracle in your life?…our children will
be our miracles too. Trust God with me
because I know it won't be long…" "Who are you Sara…" Lawson was
weak with her words "The one who vowed to be with you
till the end" she smiled through her
thin tears "God I love you so much Sara" He
hugged her again "So will you come back home with
me?" Sara searched his eyes "I have no other place to call home"
He placed a soft kiss on her lips. 2 years after Lawson and Sara were
on the sofa
watching a late night movie. Sara was
resting on his shoulders when she felt
the movement "Lawson Lawson, it moved again…
don't miss it this time touch touch" she
gently placed his palm on the side of
the stomach. Both felt the movement
of their child "I can feel him…I can feel him" Lawson
placed his head on her belly "I can feel him growing each day
inside of me…" "What do you think its saying now by
this movement?" "Thank you dada for believing in me"
she laughed. They both laughed "The
movement has stopped" he slowly
removed his head from her stomach,
"I think he's sleeping" Sara rested on his shoulders again, "In
six months you'd be a father, "You
finally got your miracle" Lawson tilted his wife's face to him,
looking into her eyes, "Sara…you were
the miracle I needed. Thank you for
not leaving me." Sara tickled his nose with hers, "I love
you too. Always will", she smiled, "We
missed a whole lot on our movie" "Movie can wait, but this can't" He
gently planted a kiss on her belly. Hi Friends, First, we forget our
vows so easily, so
quickly that once our marriages start
hitting the rocks, we fail to realize that
there is power in union. When there is
union, every mountain can be
subdued. The problem is people don't yet understand the concept of
marriage and trust me, until you do,
please don't go to the alter because
what you don't understand will
eventually become a burden and
confuse you. The concept of marriage is 'for better, for worse'. The 'worse'
moments always come. I am not
saying expect bad things but I'm
saying that challenges come in
marriage to make you stronger in
oneness so don't use it against yourselves. Second, miracles are real and I hope
we all learn to have the patience to
have our miracles in the end.
Remember that marriage is a 'stick and
stay' relationship not a 'hit and run'
thing. Remember your vows each day, enjoy
your marriage, you deserve it! Credit- Shugga Coulton
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